SOOOOOoooooOooooOoooo, you’re in a relationship and it’s going swell. Very swell. You guys are at each other’s places all the time. LIKE ALL THE DAMN TIME. So one of you suggest maybe moving in together. So how do you know if you’re ready? whelp,
Tbh, theres no specific right time to do so. When your gut knows, you just know. The question won’t make you cringe or tummy turn. I personally, had to live on my own for quite a bit before considering it. I wanted to truly feel myself run a little household and figure out what I like and enjoy. Okay, okay you caught me. I also just needed time to be a slob and not responsible. Unfortunately a couple fish had to die in my care before I got it together (RIP Drake, Sylvia, and the Migos). BUT, living with your significant other can show you just how truly compatible you guys are and teach you the true meaning of compromise sometimes. Anyways, before you make this life changing decision there are a couple things to ask yourself.
- Do you guys know to disagree? This is super duper important. Every little thing doesn’t warrant a brawl. Hopefully you guys are in the space where you can disagree on something and have a conversation that doesn’t turn into yelling. Living together will cause you to have to make a lot more mutual decisions together and if you don’t know how to talk things out then someone might end up spending most nights on the couch. boo, no fun
- Does this decision stem from romantic reasons or convenience ? I honestly think you want a good blend of both. TBH tbh tooobehonesttt, I always considered my man as living in the middle of nowhere lol. But, throughout the relationship he’s made it super easy to get to him and back and wherever. If you love someone enough, you don’t mind kinda going out your way ( both of y’all shouldn’t mind tho). BUTTTTT if its truly a hassle in anyway to relocate no amount of love will help. You’ll probably just end up resenting them. boo, no fun
- Do their habits bother you? When someone shows you who they are the first time, believe them. If you can’t stand how they come over and leave their wet towel lying wherever, please understand your irritation will be amplified when you see/deal with it every day. SO access if their quirks and habits are something you genuinely consider part of their charm. Remember, you can’t go into anything hoping to change someone
- Have you seen them at their worst? I’m sure you’ve seen them at their best. But have you seen each other when things aren’t all kosher? I vividly remember early on puking my guts out while ugly crying v early on in our relationship – he just consoled me. Then instantly tried to tackle my problem(it had nothing to do with him). If he can’t be there for you now, how can you expect him to be there later when y’all are always going to be around each other? Life happens, Death happens, Jobs get lost, Trouble finds you… Is this who you can trust to be there?
If it’s not, pls pls please save yourself the grieve and don’t even consider moving in. Maybe wait.